I’ve Got An Issue #24: Divorce

Welcome to I’ve Got An Issue.

Today, we tackle the best alternative to being cheated on and taking it like masochist you are, divorce. Divorce is when you used to love someone, but you have to leave them because of a legit reason or because you are a complete piece of garbage who shouldn’t have never gotten married in the first place. You know who you are, you are like the person who can’t keep their eyes on their plate of food. You just looking at everyone else’s food, setting up appointment talking bout you are going to a meeting when you are really meeting up at a hotel to get a taste of the new food. Of course you have food at home, you committed too, but you just have a problem being faithful to the food that loves you so much. I see you ya sly dog you. A couple of years ago I would have said this was a sensitive topic, since I am a child of divorce, but I have matured. Amazing what a year’s time can do. This may be one of the worst Christmas presents for some families tomorrow. I think you are a complete jerk to ruin Christmas with yourself bullcrap. I hope that does not happen to any of you.

With that being said, let’s see a couple reasons why it would be ok to get a divorce.


  • Partner is abusive
    Let’s face it some people suck. These people can deceive you for years till you figure out how awful they actually are. From coming across as a knight in shining armor to a queen who has her own, people are great at faking it. They can hold a stance on not hitting or breaking down their partner, but after they get comfortable they hit either mentally with a hook or with an actual hook. By no means you should stay with someone who will put their hands on you or make you feel less than a person even if their sex game is top notch. You do not stay. Respect yourself at all times. Your partner should follow suit. A person who loves you would never cross those lines. Get that divorce and be safe.
  • Partner is toxic to your family and future.
    Toxic meaning poisonous to the family you are trying to build or your actual family. If your partner isn’t doing anything to benefit their life or simply refuses too once you are married you should absolutely leave. You cannot make a person do something they do not want to do. Your partner doesn’t have to like your family per say, but he or she should respect them since both family are becoming a union. Someone who is constantly fighting with your family is not gonna result in a healthy marriage. Again, your partner does not have to like them as much as you may like them, but respect is something definitely needed. Moments like this require action. If talking sense to them won’t work, divorce maybe a very smart action to escape the black hole your partner is trying to drag you in.
  • Marrying too soon
    Love can cause us to make some stupid decisions. Nothing is wrong with getting married quickly. Sometimes it works for young couples, while others end up regretting marrying someone without really knowing them. Sure things may have been sunshine and roses the first couple of years, but maybe you come to a point where you ask yourself “Is this what I really want”? If the answer is no, you need to sit your partner down and have the talk about divorce. Personally, I think it is key to get to know someone before you make the big decision to propose. If I don’t know you well enough or know deep down I’m not happy, it would be pretty silly to make a fool out of myself proposing on camera of course.  I advise you not to marry a person off of a one night stand or pressure because everyone likes y’all together. Do not get pressured into anything. Your happiness belongs to you and you do not belong to anyone. The same rules apply to dating.
    Pretty much self explanatory. I don’t know how long you kept your relationship alive with all the cheating on the side, but the audacity of you to propose or accept a proposal knowing you aren’t gonna be faithful. Shame on you. People like you should just stay bachelors and bachelorettes till you have that cheating bug out of your system. You are wasting someone’s time, someone who truly cares about you and wants to make things work out, but you can’t keep it in your pants or your legs closed. More power to you if you get a divorce because someone cheated on you.


    Seriously, this is one of the most common reasons people get a divorce. Instead of sitting down with their partner, talking about their transgressions, and looking for options to fix those transgressions, they decide to cheat and prowl for new vagina or penis. OF course, the secret will go underneath the radar for a couple of years until the person doing the cheating is sure they are going to get a divorce just to get married to the person they cheated with. Logically it makes no sense to get married, divorce, and get married again to someone you may divorce for another person. The process makes no sense, but it is bound to repeat. If your whole reason to get a divorce is to marry someone else, then you are not only idiotic and spineless, but you shouldn’t have been married in the first place. I feel like once two people get married they become a team and they should talk about their problems and try to work them out. As adults, we should at least do that. IF two people can’t work it out, then it is reasonable to get a divorce. I find it very unreasonable to get a divorce because you wanted to marry someone else. It is heartbreaking to hear stories and even see some of them play out in life.
  • Selfishness
    Compromise is a real aspect of marriage. Everything cannot go your way. If one tiny disagreement causes you to automatically want a divorce, then you should reevaluate why you got married in the first place. You cannot have your cake and eat it too. I know for a fact healthy relationships do not work like that. Grow up and speak to your partner. Quit jumping to extremes.
    Listen, if you have kids, your kids are going to be affected by the sudden divorce. ESPECIALLY IF THEY ARE OLD ENOUGH TO UNDERSTAND WHAT DIVORCE MEANS. Look at me! I think I turned out ok! Anyways, I understand all marriages don’t always work out in the end, yet you should always consider your children. I feel like sometimes it is worth sticking together, working out problems, more deliberating on certain topics, and eventually coming to an agreement to make the marriage work for the children. Who knows a part of that agreement can be getting a divorce once all the kids are taken care of with joint custody. Seriously, you do not want a custody battle or your kids resenting you because you chose happiness over them. Both of those are ugly situations with terrible consequences. Finally, do not try to convince yourself that they are going to be ok because of your decision making…stop that.  Always keep your children in mind if you are considering a divorce.

And there you have it! To recap, you have every right to get a divorce if you are being abused or if the person you married turned out a toxic monster. I mean of course you stay with them if they turn out to be the toxic avenger because they are a superhero….from New Jersey. Sorry I couldn’t resist. You get a divorce if you married too soon and if you know deep down you can’t stay faithful. Definitely think about your children too before you go through with a divorce. No respect for you if you get a divorce for new penis or vagina or just being a selfish loser.

Till the next Issue!!!



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