Tag Archives: Optimism

Looking into the FUTURE.

I’ve Got An Issue #29: Love Is A Cruel Joke


Just when you think I’m gone forever! I pop back up feeling a little more clever! Well hello there! I’ve Got An Issue has been on hiatus for some time, but I’m back with it! I hope you enjoy this one. It is unlike most of the previous issues.  Consistency isn’t my strongest suit at the moment, but I’m working on it. I’ll be post more stuff soon…that is if I and I can get it together. Discipline and a schedule is needed lol. Enjoy everyone!


Love Is Cruel

Yesterday I had a thought: Love is a cruel joke.  This thought was followed by the expansion pack: Love is a cruel magic trick. You see I know that Love can be one of the most positive, negative, powerful, beautiful, and amazing experience that  a human being can go through. Let’s face it as cheesy and cliché love can be sometimes, Love is pretty awesome. Love is a wonderful feeling when it works out perfectly and a terrible after thought when executed poorly. I like to think of Love like mana in fantasy books and video games. You have limited uses of love mana, buy when it is created you have witnessed a spectacle. Love is full of magic that can build a lore that your grandkids will look back at and aspire to have one day. Unfortunately, real love is a rarity in this world. It is as rare as an unreleased album by Prince or unreleased studio session by The Beatles. So when you have it you should hold on as tight as you can. It makes perfect sense, hold on to awesome people because well other people can’t have them. It is natural to be selfish in this moment. Love is a beautiful gift from The Maker or whatever deity you serve. It is necessity we humans need in order to keep pushing through this thing called life. You can go it alone like Beck said, but isn’t it nicer to have a companion to go through life with? For most of us, the answer is undeniably yes.

One thing remains true, love is a cruel joke.

Why is it a cruel joke then? Why do I feel this way? You may think that what I said in the previous paragraph refutes that statement alone, but let me indulge you on why I think love is a cruel joke. I’ve seen this “joke” play out countless times in my life whether that’s personal or just an on looker from the other side.

Love is cruel because it can enable you to lower all your defenses at let a person see you for you. UH OH! There is a breach in your fortress and that person has made a room in there! You know so they won’t ever leave you ALONE! Love is cruel because you can show a person the real you, meaning you can expose your strengths and weakness to them hoping they will do the same for you. Spoiler alert: they never do. Darn it, they now know everything about me and will use it to their advantage! What do I win? Congratulations you have been courting a fallacy please enjoy our home version of the game: Cruel Lovers for great people! I swear that game is a best seller somewhere. Love is cruel because you can give yourself to a person freely only to be used. That’s right you just got punk’d only there is no Ashton Kutcher around to give you a hug and laugh at how dumb you looked. You thought those feelings were real?! Sir or Madam you are delusional. Love is cruel because you can give your all and it is not enough. Welcome to life ladies and gentlemen because that is going to happen a lot. Love is cruel because you trust someone just for them to eviscerate you and that trust. Oh yeah didn’t see that coming did ya? Have fun putting yourself back together. WHO KNOWS HOW LONG THAT IS GONNA TAKE HAHAHA! Love is cruel because truth and honesty just isn’t enough anymore. Do you have a side of cheating to spice up the relationship or I’m going to abandon you in general? This relationship was boring soooooooo somebody had to do something! Love is cruel because you can love someone to the moon and stars only for that person not to reciprocate that love to you EVER. Either you just aren’t forward enough or you are a diamond in the rough when the person doesn’t have the tools to dig you out of the rough.  They could be dense in the head or they know you love them dearly, but will never ever shoot that love back at you. Cruel isn’t it? Many reasons besides this classify love as cruel joke.

However, this isn’t a bad thing!

Maybe love is a cruel joke at times, but be thankful for the joke. Be thankful for that magic trick expansion pack. Be thankful for the experience. Guess what genius? I don’t know if you know this, but somehow you got through it. You persevered! You became a winner in your eyes. You believed in yourself to pull yourself out of the hole you were in. Sure it took you some time, but that cruel joke brought valuable lessons. You learned that everyone isn’t for everyone; some folks don’t love as hard as you do. This is okay! Hopefully, you know to rein your emotions back a little bit. You learned to sift through those who are untrue and false to find those who feel the way you do. I guarantee you will love them harder than any of your past loves because you are both sharing each other with each other. AWW SO ADORABLE!  Do you understand what I’m saying to you? You learned to catch on very quickly to situations where you aren’t making much progress love wise. You know where you stand and it is okay. Stand there, but don’t stay there! Move forward because it is the best thing to do. There are so many experiences down the road ahead! You learned how you love people. Each style varies. You may give it your all one hundred percent of the time, just to get hurt again, but that is who you are or you may be very cautious when it comes to loving people, but again that is who you are. Modifying that style and adapting to the way you love people is a process. Some of us can change it while others are either one style of many.

Yes, love is a beautiful experience crafted from magic, chemistry, trust, honesty, and real emotions.

Just remember one thing: love is also cruel joke yet you learned from it and now you can laugh.

Single.


It’s a real trap.

When Nobody loves you to the moon and back.

When Nobody loves you to pieces

Being single…………

Is one of many life’s unnoticed tiny diseases

Yet it is fun because you don’t owe anybody or belong to anyone! You can do what you want, not saying you sign your life away once you make somebody your bae or become completely dependent when the friendship evolves to relationship, resulting in you just spending time with them all day leaving all your friends astray, Ooh you changed,   but life just can’t be this way! Ok maybe I’m reaching because all relationships don’t go down that path. It just depends on who you start this with…

To be frank, I’m sick of this lonely shit.

Where is my Alice?  I don’t wanna be Quentin!
I wanna fall in love with one person and keep our status hidden never revealing to the audience the trick that got you here because that would make me bad magician

I’m just saying

Where’s the love? I grow weary of being patient, I won’t lie every couple I see erupts a thought in me stating “I’m hating on y’all happy asses”. False savage doing all the mathematics just to come to the conclusion that I’m actually happy for y’all happy asses.

I swear…..

I would love for the solution to be different, but this is what happens when your truly selfless and not selfish towards every single person. Honey this is the worst type of hell. I mean don’t get me wrong my life is swell but when you get bitten by lovebugs, you can become a love fool or a bitter tool adjusting your cardigan.

I mean if you gonna be an ass towards love you might as well be stylish friend.

Man….

I just want someone to look at me like blue bell ice cream or pizza…because we all know pizza is bae and if you don’t like pizza don’t look my way. Look

I’m saying I want love, that quality love, that everlasting we the best, you loyal, smart, grateful, I’ll fight for us if you do the same, we don’t own each other, but I will change your last name, optimistic yet realistic,  there will never be another one, roller coaster of love under any weather, al green let’s stay together, you and me forever, etched in a tree, sidewalk, or heart type of love. I only see these in my dreams. I love me, but this is one con of being single. I put up a hard armor, but deep down I’m glass see through. I just wonder when am I ever gonna meet you? When will this long shot of a fantasy come true? Don’t you know I’ve been dreaming of you since Middle School? By the way F middle school…worst time ever.

This is such a strange situation. I have so many questions, but I know the answer my equation. Time. Timing. Timing. Timing. Much like Location. Location. Location to real estate, that’s the simple answer to everything along with Patience. Patience. Patience.

Deep down as much as I don’t want to say it….love I need you.

Times like this make me hate being single…

White Crayon.jpg

I’ve Got An Issue #23: A rant about something or nothing?


Welcome to I’ve Got An Issue.

Hi.

I have something to share. It is a little rant. This rant came out of a dream. A dream of subtle realization that lead to this rant.

Nothing is the same and won’t be the same ever. I wish everyone would cut the bull and understand that. It takes work for things to get fixed. It takes work for things to change properly. It takes effort. And all I can tell you is I barely see any effort which makes me think “hey this isn’t gonna change, we are walking in circles”. I’m tired overall, but I’m tired of walking in circles. Nothing won’t change. YOU CAN CHANGE it. You have the power to. This is obvious. I’m just saying nothing won’t be the same ever. You’ll never have cake and eat it too unless it is physically cake. This the only time you get to have cake and eat it. I thought you knew that already.  Nothing won’t be the same ever. You have to accept this in order for progress.

ANYWAYS

Friends come, Friends go, relationships start, relationships end, ties get cut, people change for the better or worse, people change, people change, you change, you care, you don’t care. What is important is how you take all of this in. Everything is going to change while it may feel like nothing. Your reaction is important. You either react like a little child who won’t let anything go and will do anything to get that feeling, relationship, friendship, job, money, etc back. You’ll change for the wrong reasons because you are chasing a ghost of your past. Did I mention things are gonna change? You know you have power right?  Option two requires you to let it all go, burn all those memories away,  say goodbye to this burning field of memories as much as it may hurt, hold on to one memento from it for nostalgia purposes, lock their ashes in a box, walk away, cry a little bit, cry a lot, hurt a lot, reminder yourself not to chase ghosts, flip em all off, be bitter, be upset, be pissed off, let it out, let it go, pray if it helps, forgive if you can, and live magnificently. You have the right to feel all of these emotions at once so don’t let anyone tell you how you should feel towards something. I cannot express how much I don’t like someone telling me they have been through the exact same thing. NO you haven’t. They aren’t in this at that moment. Sure the past offered that experience to a person, however, it won’t equal to however you are feeling. It doesn’t count once you have let all of the pain go to me anyways. So when they say they understand, make that into white noise. Some are legit trying to help so be aware of that and try to tell them as nicely as possible that they aren’t gonna get it. Listen to what they have to say though.

No one owes you a damn thing in this world despite the smiles and promises. You have to work at everything to get a little bit of something. Don’t be fool and fall for it. Be so self aware it is scary. Go get what you want. Be reasonable, don’t be a giant fool. Don’t put all your eggs in one basket, I learned that the hard way (That dream also made me realize why men and women talk to multiple partners at once. You gotta have options before you lock one down right? Another issue for another time). I have no idea where I’m going with this.  I know one aspect if any I would like you to take away something from this. Understand that nothing is going to be the same, everything changes, people & life are gonna let you down sometimes, you understand yourself better than people do, YOU have the power in most situations life throws at you, sometimes you won’t have any power due to everything being out of your hands, your reaction is important, and your past doesn’t own you. You own your past. The only useful objects the past can offer is things to avoid in the future or things to chase in the future. You are a winner, pink starburst, billion dollars,  fallout 4, the essence of love, the best thing since sliced bread, and royalty in your own little world. Don’t be a fool though.  Don’t let the world beat you down even though it may throw haymakers and quick jabs every. single. day. Stay strong. Compete with yourself, not others or the world. Don’t lose yourself in your sorrow or depression (been there done that rose from it). Go follow your dreams. Go find your wings. Go on an adventure. Go taking life one day at a time. Go at your pace.

Go Team You.

If no one is rooting for you, I’m rooting for you and I don’t even know you that well.

Till next time

-MCZX

I’ve Got An Issue #20: The Friendzone


Welcome to I’ve Got An Issue!

Oh gosh this is going to be a fun one! Today’s topic is this phenomenon called the friend zone! If you don’t know what this “zone” is, may I enlighten you? According to google, the friend zone is “a situation in which a friendship exists between two people, one of whom has an unreciprocated romantic or sexual interest in the other”. WHAT A CLEAR DEFINITION! Also, friend zone is a noun if you didn’t do too well in English class. I mean I thought that would be obvious, but you know some people just don’t know what those are. May I share a little trivia for the friend zone as well? Did you know there was a TV show on MTV called Friendzone who confess to their best friends in which the said friend would either give it a shot or just crush their dreams like Rusev crushes backs…and Lana. RUSEV MACHKA! DID YOU ALSO KNOW THAT THIS SHOW LASTED FOR FIVE SEASONS? FIVE ENTIRE BROKEN HEARTED & CHANCE GIVEN SEASONS! HOW THE HELL DID THIS LAST THAT LONG!!!? HOW MANY TIMES CAN YOU WATCH A PERSON BASICALLY TURN INTO A MONSTER OR BECOME EXTREMELY HAPPY? HOW!? Wow is all I can say. The friend zone can be a awful place to be in because you want that person to look at you the way you look at them. However, I propose this question: What if the friend zone doesn’t actually exist?

Personally, I used to believe it was real. I used to think girls would do that to people they know like them a lot, but won’t give it a shot. I even watched the first season of Friendzone (SERIOUSLY THERE WAS FIVE SEASONS!) and related to the failures more than the success stories on there. It was liberating to see there was hope for some who laid it all on the table and got a shot. I gotta tell you when you are young and every person you catch feelings for does not reciprocate the emotions you have for them, you can believe anything to make yourself feel better about rejection. Oh rejection you ugly son of a bitch….stop eating all the snacks and pay your rent. At that time, the friend zone made the most sense in all my rejections, but as I grew older and matured I realized that wasn’t an answer I could accept in my life. Clearly it was flawed logic. It took time, but I had to accept that I was simply rejected despite how awesome I may think I am (at times, let’s be honest I ain’t shhhhhh ever). It was very humbling experience. Yes, I got rejected, but you know what? That is completely OK! I’m not going to say there are plenty of fish in the sea to make myself feel better or say I was “friend zoned” because no one could possibly not like me.

Guess what ladies and gents? There is no friend zone…stop saying that there is. You are only hurting yourself beloved. Rejections sucks, but denial is way worse!

I think there are 3 type of people in this love game.

  1. People who strongly share mutual feelings of love towards you as you do to them (I’m not talking the friend love where you care about them, but you aren’t about to be in no relationship with them. Anyone can care lol.)
  2. People who fake those strong feelings you have for them ONLY when you do something for them whether that be a gift, buying them something, taking em out to eat (If that’s not your man or woman, GO DUTCH all the time), paying bills, and being an emotional support only for them, but they are never there for you. Where those feelings now?
  3. People who just cannot like you in that way. Please do not force them to do so either

The second type of people are the worst.

Listen to me, you are worth someone loving you. It may take a long time to find someone who complements you very well or that person may be right around the corner waiting to put you in a headlock taking so long to show up while their heart was getting broken. I know yall had to see that video on some sort of social media site where the guy did that to his girlfriend and began to cry lol! I’m still waiting for the moment I meet that lady, everything changes, and I put her in a headlock. Playfully of course. Domestic violence is weak and toxic. JUST LIKE THE FRIEND ZONE. Don’t fool yourself with the idea that every person you have strong feelings for friendzoned you. Maybe they just don’t like you in that way. It is very reasonable you know? No one owes you an explanation on why you weren’t picked unless that person in question feels the need to explain clearly why. If the pain is too much for you, just stop being friends with them. Sometimes too much contact with the person who hurt you isn’t going to benefit you. You may need some alone time with yourself. It is going to be ok and life is going to move on trust me.

It pays to be optimistic. You don’t have to be blindly optimistic to the point where you aren’t sounding realistic. You want to be realistic while maintaining that optimism. Optimism is strong tool…it is a freaking superpower! Also, don’t think you need to be with someone to be happy either. It isn’t about needing a person to provide that. You can be happy all by yourself. Just be optimistic that you may meet that special someone who will play a huge role in your life. Whether that is your soulmate or best friend for life. Don’t let rejection ruin your character. Adjust and learn. Do not self destruct within yourself. Focus on you and your goals! Get things you want accomplished! Be comfortable in your skin! Travel! Read a book! Write! Play some video games! Watch some anime! Work out! Do what makes you happy! Enjoy this gift called life! You deserve love and one day it is going to come you whether that is with someone or within yourself!

Stay focused and remember the friend zone does not exist!

Till next time!

-MCZX

The 12 Days Of Honest ProCons: Optimistically Cynical


Welcome to the 12 Days of Honest ProCons!!!! I hope you all like to read because this one is probably the longest one so far. We do have 5 days left after all! Well I hope you enjoy this entry! Reading Time!!!


Optimistically Cynical

Pro: Optimistic (adj.)

  1. Disposed to take a favorable view of events or conditions and to expect the most favorable outcome.
  2. Reflecting a favorable view of events and conditions and the expectation of a positive outcome; demonstrating optimism
  3. Of or relating to optimism.

Ladies and Gentlemen, we live in a world where despair, disappointment, and unhappiness is presented on a daily basis. Presented through life, social media, books, television, music, etc. It is obvious that negativity is the ruler on the planet. A planet full of some optimistic dreamers who just want better for everyone. A planet where those said optimistic dreamers get their hopes and ideas dashed because the world wants them to be realistic. “Oh that idea is stupid, Oh don’t do that there is no career in that, Oh don’t follow your dreams….join the big party we are having here. Join regret” I say nothing is wrong with being realistic however you have to at least follow your dreams. I know it is hard to here, but you have to at least try. You know that quote by Norman Vincent Peale? You have heard it before. I know if you have heard The B. Coming you have heard this quote. “Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss you’ll land among the stars”. I recommend you to do that with a vision you have. Just go for it.

Sorry….I talked a bit too much. I just want you all to understand optimism.

If I had to pick the toughest pro, optimism would be number one. You know why it’s the hardest one out of all the others?

Optimism requires work. You have to be work to be Optimistic. It doesn’t just come by smiling at everything, letting everything go, pleasing people not named (insert your name) or being optimistically unrealistic. It requires work! You have to believe in yourself for optimism to work. You need to add a pinch of realism to optimism in order for optimism to truly work. You have to accept the crappy things that life brings you. DO NOT PUSH THEM DOWN OR BRUSH THEM UNDER THE RUG. Those crappy feelings will come to the light via an explosion and you will feel better after it.

Optimism is a super power. The people who have it are amazing people for that reason. People with it aren’t quite like most adults…they live like children. They don’t literally live like little kids. When I say they live like children, I mean they look at the world the way a child does…openly. Of course they are realistic, but they believe they can do anything they put their mind to. I swear on everything that’s holy it’s amazing. People with this superpower can talk anyone down, become friends with anyone, keep hope alive and most importantly be a magnet of realistic positivity.

For example, there is a person I know through facebook named Tiffany Garay and let me tell you something she is a beacon of optimism at its core. I’m telling you right now she is going to be something huge one day. She is always trying to inspire people through statuses or making us laugh with silly ones. She does what she can to make the world a brighter place and I gotta tell you she makes everyone’s facebook a brighter place. I can tell she is a great person based off of her values and morals and I never even met her yet. I remember one day back in February something she posted hit me so much I had to save it because I was having a down day. It was this comment that alone that let me know Tiffany is an amazing person.

It reads “Matthew Cyprian That just made my night, knowing that I was able to help one person tonight. Thank you so much. But I’m not the smart one, you’re the smart one. To be able to disregard other people’s opinions and just learn to be happy with yourself shows so much about your self-worth. That alone makes you an amazing, invincible, and strong young man. And I admire you, Matthew. Just by that alone. I use to have really low self-esteem as well, and I finally learned how to get over it . Wake up and say something positive about yourself everyday. Look at the optimistic view of something, instead of dwelling on the negatives. Instead of thinking I was stupid when I did poorly on a test, I would be like “Ha. Someone else definitely did worst than me. I’ll just use this as motivation to study harder next time.” You seem like an amazing person and we should definitely talk more (: Size does not correlate to beauty! I can so feel you ,if you ever want to talk about your insecurities. I actually feel ugly bc of how skinny I am. I try so hard to gain weight and it sucks bc I can’t. I have a really fast metabolism and my body just…I don’t know why. Some of it is genetics and I can’t control it but. I learned to just deal. I’m fine the way I am and someone will love me just the way I am. You’re actually REALLY handsome. Like no lie. You have really nice eyes and your smile is GORGEOUS! I wish I could smile like that ;-; I can’t wait to get these braces off finally, lol. You will make some woman very happy one day. No doubt “

BOOM goes the freaking dynamite right!!?! I read this from times to time when I’m feeling down. When she is having a bad day she will admit to it. It’s not one of “those cry for help statuses” or please “look at me” statuses, it is just a straight up honest status about how this day sucks and this group of people who have never met (or some have) come together and cheer tiff up to keep going. She is freaking awesome yall and I wish her the best in life. I hope we will get to meet some day!

I hope I have made my point. I gave you an example of a real life person and defined it for you multiple times. Do you see why optimism is so hard to hold on too now? It is something you just don’t want to let go because the world sucks sometimes.

I have a freaking superpower that I NEED TO WORK ON. It’s not perfect yet. I won’t lie mentally I haven’t been in the best space for the past two years. I am working on it so I can fully utilize my optimism. I can’t just let it slip away from me. I’m too awesome to let that happen. I believe things will get better for me and soon these bad thoughts I have won’t have the voice of a giant, but the voice of dog whistle. Quiet in public, but annoying sound only I can hear in my head. I’m going to make those bad thoughts go soft in their voice. Each day I have to remind myself that everything is going to be better and one day everything you hoped and dreamed of will come true. One day I’ll have everything I see in my head: a great paying job, my own place, a stress free mindset, books in the process of completion, more music projects,   a companion, steadiness, happiness, peace of mind, etc. It’s coming just like that Jay Electronica album we are all waiting for (that is if you are a hip-hop head). It’s going to be on its way, but I can’t sit on my ass and expect to show up. It just doesn’t work that way. I have to work on it…I HAVE TO WORK ON THIS. I WILL NOT LET MYSELF DOWN…I AM NOT THEM, I AM ME.

It’s a day by day process, but one day I can say I made it there.


Con: Cynical (adj.)

  1. Distrusting or disparaging the motives of others; like or characteristic of a cynic.
  2. Showing contempt for accepted standards of honesty or morality by one’s actions, especially by actions that exploit the scruples of others.
  3. Bitterly or sneeringly distrustful, contemptuous, or pessimistic.

When you don’t work on being optimistic about life, you grow pessimistic. When you let pessimism run the show for a couple of months, you will quickly gain another superpower called cynicism which is by far the worst of the superpowers. What is included with cynicism? Oh distrusting everything, paranoia, hatred for self, disturbing thought process, ulterior motives, slices of negativity pie, defensive shells to go into because you why face life and many, many more additional pieces if you buy cynicism! It practically sells itself! I mean why wouldn’t you want it? I mean you don’t want to do the work for optimism right? So why don’t you settle for this!?

This is what the cynical salesman told me in my head. Two years ago it sounded like the best way to go….the world serves you crap so you serve it crap back. You take away your wonderful gifts and let them rot for a little while because you don’t know how to cope with these new feelings. You can’t trust your own reasonable thoughts….you become a little more broken than you actually were.

I believed that salesman in my head…I shouldn’t have listened to that salesman in my head.

Since I listened to that salesman, cynicism follows pessimism and optimism like the third wheel on a date. I think I have mastered cynicism. It doesn’t matter what people say or do because it is hard to believe they have your back. “Why would they when the world doesn’t?” The world is not supposed to have your back…you are. “What has optimism done for you lately?” So much, but I can’t see it due to this cloud in front of me. Of course you aren’t thinking this though because your thoughts are elsewhere. Your common sense and logic are elsewhere. Everything is not where it should be because of cynicism. All that is there is reinforcement of people being phony, people are not to be trusted, you are not to be trusted, and this world is not to be trusted. There is no chance for advancement when those thoughts are stuck like boulders in small places. Try wedging them out with your hands…I dare you.

There are times where I can’t trust people because of cynicism. They could have the best intentions, but I cannot trust them. It’s gotten like this with just about all my friends. I mean they aren’t my friends if I can’t trust them right? Wrong. I do trust some of them, but cynicism made me question that many times this year. I thought of destroy years of friendship I have with three people because of cynicism. Maybe time off from them would help me out, but to immediately think “F*** em they gotta go” with no rhyme or real reason is messed up. It’s not them just maybe I need a break from a bunch of people for this to truly go away. I don’t know what I need…lies…I do know what I need and that’s more optimism.

I don’t think too many people understand the wars going on in my head. My thoughts became a mess because of cynicism. It’s my fault because I let that happen. I let these stupid thoughts seep in to my thought process becoming a toxic that I have to now clean up. “Everything is trying to get you”, “everyone is trying to hurt you”, “No one loves you for you”, “you aren’t important”, “they aren’t important”, “you are ugly”, “I am big and you are small can’t you see?” “your best friends aren’t your friends”, “this person wants something from you”, “you’re only important when you are doing a task”, “people only like you cause of your things”, “You aren’t loved”,  are just some of the thoughts that come through. However, my fighting optimism will counterpoint those thoughts with “You are important”, “you are amazing”, “there is no one like you”, “I love you”, “your best friends are your friends”, “I think you can trust this person”, “these people may like you”, “you are important”, “you are beautiful”, “those thoughts are small and we are big understand that”, “don’t listen to it, listen to me”, “the toxic is going to leave one day”, “people like you because of you”, “everyone is not trying to hurt you”, “please know I love you”. THIS IS EVERYDAY. SO if you ever expected me (if we have hung out) to be something like a cheery clown or a happy person, do you now understand why it’s so hard for me to click that switch on and indulge with you all? I can’t just be that in y’all life if am dealing with that upstairs. Matt isn’t present sometimes…Matt is just cleaning up the crap so he can enjoy the moment. My face will be in “classic Matt face” or now known as “resting bitch face”. So don’t be alarmed if I am not smiling despite having a great time…I am just thinking…and I am fighting.

I am fighting. Everyone, I am fighting. One day I’ll have cynicism afraid of me.


 

ProCon: Optimistically Cynical

You know something? This is why I write sometimes so things can die down up there. I’m feeling so much better typing this out instead of letting it sit there. It feels like a toilet flushing and new blue water rushing in. Ok maybe that was a bad analogy implying my mind is a toilet…it’s not. It is beautiful. Let me try again. It feels like a refreshing shower or bath. I feel like I just washed off a lot of gunk in this one and now I feel clean. J

I am optimistically cynical…and one day I’ll just be optimistically Matt.

Till Day 8!

Signed,

MC.